Frequencies of Loving You

¨Mature love is not caught up in a fantasy. It is willing to see someone for who they are and choosing to love them fully.¨ 
– Thema Davis

Can you hear that?
My heart beats to the frequency of your unique vibrations
Delighting me in the corny cliches I´ve spent my entire life avoiding.
My entire existence utterly consumed by the developing manifestation of you being my forever King.
Now I panic.
Are. You. Really. Real?
Sweetness radiates from the deepest depths of my untethered soul.
Navigating through the treacherous valleys of brokenness, pain and misery all residing inside.
Heart breaks and memories shooting out insecurities with one purpose – to destroy
Consumed by my expectations of perfection, while using my energy to disguise my inadequacies in a flimsy compilation of #relationshipgoals

Every moment the universe draws me closer to you
Seems to be followed by her dismal friends; fear, defiance and self doubt.
Giving into pain and misery from the past and blurring the different reality that you are.
Unwillingly destroying the sanctity of our perfect imperfection.
Causing you to question the heart you boldly decided to revive.
The ´I love you´s´ you usually hear so sweetly
Turning into sharp daggers of control and manipulation
Spiraling and spiraling deep down this familiar dark hole.
But then.
Resisting the flaws that bespeak this friction.
It´s not you I´m fighting – it´s me.
It´s not your darkness I see – it´s mine.
That desperation I sense – is labeled HERS not HIS
I close my eyes to seek clarity, ease the chaos and curdle the internal wrath.

Can you hear that?
Our hearts create our unique vibration.
Creating in each other our own cliches of wonderful validations.
Choosing to let go of the fears and doubt; defiantly choosing each other over and over again.
No more panic.
You. Are. Really. Real!

¨Love comes to those who still hope after disappointment, who still believe after betrayal and who still love after they´ve been hurt.¨ 

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